Engrained in many Eastern world cultures is RESPECT. One of my professors had a quote by Laurence Sterme in her office that read, “Respect for ourselves guides our morals, respect for others guides our manners.”
From a young age, we are trained to carry ourselves with respect; especially in African cultures where you are a representation of your family, this respect spoke volumes on where you came from.
This respect included simple things such as giving up your seat to an elder, or excusing yourself when grown folk were speaking. However, as we continue to grow our definition of respect expands and also becomes refined.After observing different encounters and how there were certain maltreatments of people, I was challenged to think about my definition of respect. My definition of respect continues to grow however, I do know that respect is something that should be objective. Its objectivity ensures that a person receives and gives respect, regardless of age, gender, and social class.
With such a basis, I do believe that the true spirit of mutual respect can be found. Granted there are certain instances where a person “superior” might receive more respect but that shouldn’t take away the mutual respect and understanding between people.I have observed how certain people talk to waiters, cleaners, and other service providers with such carelessness and it is quite saddening. Never give yourself the power to belittle someone due to their job and class. We never know what someone is going through or the kind of pressure one carries on their shoulders, therefore the least we can give each other respect.
We gain nothing from being disrespectful neither do we lose anything when we give each other respect. With respect comes understanding and cooperation. Sometimes, people wonder why they do not receive the best service after being unkind to others and I find it quite interesting. If you enter an establishment and begin disrespecting and lambasting people, that same energy will sometimes be matched. Therefore, if we choose to begin all our encounters with mutual respect then we can skip the unpleasantries and get the best out of all of our interactions.
Granted, there are instances where we are on the receiving end of the disrespect. In moments like these, it is easier to come in guns blazing and fight fire with fire. However this approach only tackles the symptom rather than tackling the cause. Fight unkindness with kindness. One of the most popular saying between my siblings and I is, “kill them with kindness”. We hold unto this because when you match someone’s negativity with more negativity, you give up your self-respect by stooping down to such a level. So, in such instances, do not match one’s negative energy but rather rise above it and kill them with kindness.
Remember that before anything we are all humans; nothing makes you or me better than the other. Therefore, respect shouldn’t depend on anything else.
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