Your mental space is one of the most prized possessions that you may have. Without a decluttered and well cared for mental space, we can find ourselves in situations and mental spaces that lead us to destruction. As I become more conscious about how I care for my mental space, I learn more and more about how much the care I give my mental space affects all other aspects of my life. Like a domino effect, it takes one slip for all things to keep trickling and changing in your life. This change for me started about two years ago, and it still continues to this day, because life is a journey of living and learning.
The end of 2018 and the beginning of 2019 were difficult for me in different aspects. This was the first time I had been completely thrown into a new environment and with that I had to adapt to a lot of different things in my life. At that point in my life, I can honestly say that I felt I was not ready. I went through a rollercoaster of emotions, struggles, self-loathing, and a multitude of other emotions and states of mind. The outcome of all of this, or bottom line was that my life was in shambles. I felt as though my life was not moving in the direction it should be moving, I was losing hope in the things I planned for myself, and most of all I started having more self-doubt. This negative mental space pushed me to be more distant from people and close myself off completely.
In the middle of 2019 I started seeing changes in my life that I did not expect, and with that I had to push myself to start thinking outside of my usual train of thought. I had to push myself to be more active about my growth, and that pushed me to be more analytical about how I treat myself, my mental space, and how that pours out into my relationships and the things I do. The more analytical and conscious I became, the more I realized that I did not give myself the space to feel the feelings, and allow myself to go through the pain and grow through the pain.
I have come to realize that often when we catch ourselves in these tough positions, we sink into this hole of life is not treating us right. We have feelings of not being ready for changes in our lives, or certain emotions. To quote one of my favorite lyrics from Cynthia Erivo, "It's not ready, if you're not afraid." I remember hearing this and thinking about its meaning. When I think of this I flashback to when I was going through my motions, I was ready for what I was facing but I just was not giving myself the space to feel what I am going through but also understand that this is the beginning of better. People tend to say, "the grass is greener on the other side" but before you get to the other side, you have to lay at rest whatever is in the past.
Give yourself the space to feel what you are feeling and going through. Remember that life is about lessons and not losses, it all comes down on how you care for your mental space.
Take care of yourself for yourself, and things will fall into place.
Love & Light,
Zuba.
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